Fact: The Knicks should sign Bill Bellamy as Player-Coach

Never was there an athlete who found such success on the basketball court as Violator's player-coach Bill Bellamy. Never has anyone gone 2-80 from the field yet finished with 52 points after hitting a game winning 50 point shot with 3:34 left in the 3rd quarter. Rock and Jock success must translate to NBA success.

(Perhaps David Stern should consider doing away with dress codes and "professionalism" in pro-sports, and adopt the rules of the once annual, now defunct "Rock and Jock" basketball game. Remember when going "pro" meant getting paid for playing rather than its new interpretation of having to dress snazzier than Walt Clyde's moustasche on a humid Manhattan afternoon?)

I digress...anyway, think about it. Not only would the Knicks not need last minute heroics by Jamal Crawford, Stephon Marbury, and even the occassional buzzer beater by Sir Stevie Franchise "Bacon"(watch him sizzle), but we could do away with all three players as well as relegate Isaiah to the assistant coach spot. (or how about fired?)

Not only was Bellamy a great MTV V.J. (video jockey for those of you who missed the decade and a half when MTV actually meant Music TV), his on court antics coupled with his Belichick-esq on-court strategy (a shout out for the Pats-fan AoF Editor), makes him the prime court-side...nay, in-game general. As evidenced by his above interview he would love to pass like Magic and I'm certain he could swish and dish, as well as slice and dice up the Garden floor in like fashion.

Great basketball rivalries: Jordan-Bird? Yeah pretty good, but the video game kind of sucked. Magic-Bird, better.

I offer you this one: Bellamy-Cortese. That's right. Bill Bellamy versus Dan Cortese. I didn't write the article, happened to stumble upon it, but as I recall Bellamy always got the best of Cortese and the Bricklayers. Anyone recall when Simon Rex tried to step into the spotlight. Pathetic.

A final question for you: Who was the greatest Rock and Jock basketball player ever??

No, not Gena Lee Nolin (who?)

Not Dean Cain (Captian at one point, but Superman on the court he was not (although I seem to recall a big shot made)

Not JTT.

I hope you were thinking of This Guy.

UPDATE: I orginally thought this was going to be a post about what moves the Knicks should make prior to the draft. That just seemed too serious. Seriously. Just to make my point, the Knicks need one of either Gilbert Arenas or Kobe Bryant. I'd trade everyone if need be. They may not win a title, but it would sure be entertaining. Is there not one individual in sports more singularly entertaining than Gilbert Arenas? Who else has a list of every player drafted before him that he crosses off as they each exit the league? Who else yells "hibachi" after sinking a tough shot? Maybe he really enjoys Benihana....