The Writers Strike Has to Stop: Give them the 2.5%

Generally when I write so called "reviews" (complaining about the dreck that are called "hit" reality/competition/"game" shows) of television I'm not actually watching the shows. I'll admit, I'm openly critizing shows that I assume the generally less intelligent masses love, without taking the time to watch them myself. Well thanks to the minor disagreement over 2.5% of internet royalties between the Writers Guild and the TV Networks, there's been a serious lack of new non-garbage programming.

How bad has it actually gotten? Just look at my DVR. I've been recording only new programming and reruns of shows that I enjoy. The short list: American Gladiators, The Big Bang Theory, The Colbert Report, The Daily Show, Gossip Girl, How I Met Your Mother, and Two and a Half Men. Anyone who's watched American Gladiators has to miss the original hosts. Expecting a response to hard hitting questions such as "So , you just earned two points!?", gets you exactly the response to that you'd expect. Also, It's easy to pare down the contestant pool to 8 when at least one gets injured in the first event every show. Here's a picture of the new gladiator Justice - if you pan out, he's actually doubled over ripping a heinous fart and just realized he shit his unitard.

Anyway, it's a sad state of affairs when I have to record Gossip Girl just in case I completely run out of original programming. Still haven't watched it, but shamefully enough, it's there. I think it's this (high school) generations "Dawson's Creek" without the 'beek and Charlie (from Mighty Ducks). I'd do a quick "where are they now" on that cast but it's pretty simple: 'Beek- out of work, "Pacey" - out of work, TomKat - under contract (for life - or 10 years) with a sci-co (pronounced psycho). Michelle Williams is the only one working and is now the single mother of Heath Ledgers child. (moment of silence for the new "Joker"). I'm not a huge fan of Two and a Half Men, but it's decently funny enough to throw on in a pinch. Unless he's playing himself, Charlie Sheen's character is wholly unrealistic in two ways: 1) no man who clearly dyes his hair is banging that many model-hot chicks in their 20's on a regular basis (unless he's actually Charlie Sheen), and 2) no man sits on his couch to watch tv with his legs crossed like a chick. Sure I've seen it done by men before (mostly gay men) but no chauvenistc man sits like that, particularly while watching TV alone. (most would sit like that kid in the picture.

Ok, so I've been watching American Idol. I'll admit, in the early stages it's mildly amusing, but after a while when you've seen one crappy singer, you've seen them all. And seeing the joy of the "good" ones isn't enough because you know that although they made it to Hollywood, they have as much chance winning the big show as AoF has at becoming a legitimate blog. The other show I spent far too much time watching (about 4 mins) was The Moment of Truth. It's a "game" show where they ask people a bunch of questions while connected to a lie detector before the show, then asks them the same questions. The winner is the one who tells the truth. Where the hell is the game in this? What it means is if you have no conscience and really could care less if people know that you've done some morally questionable things or had mean thoughts about a loved one, you could win a bunch of money. Here's an example, I just saw a commercial for The Moment of Truth where they asked a contestant "Do you think your mother is overweight?" Then the cut to a shot of her mom, who is easily a deuce, more likely a deuce and a half. Then the crack producers make it seem like a huge deal, (piping in - I'm thinking "gasp" track) with an audience reaction akin to asking if you enjoy killing kittens and answered "yes!". Like this contestants answer is a big F'n shock. When you have trouble waddling from point A to point B, and don't have a serious groin injury, chances are you're a fat slob. Without the writers, my TV is suffering.

All I can say is it's a good thing Lost is coming back...