Moustaches From Around the World

Those of you who are regulars readers of AoF (both of you) have no doubt been up in arms over an omission of mine that is so glaring that it ought to be criminal. I am, of course, referring to a recap of Moustachio Bashio. Just in case you had fears that it had not taken place at all, let me allay your fears and reassure you, yes, moustaches from about the town, nay, the world, congregated in our backyard for one glorious day.

As means of explaining why I never posted the follow-up, I'm gonna let Vince Vaughn ("Swingers" Vince Vaughn, not "Old School" Vince Vaughn. It was kind of like new school Vince Vaughn) do the explaining for me: "Soft mattress? Yeah, it could have been the soft mattress. Or the midnight rape. Or the nude gay art show that took place in my room last night. One of those three probably contributed to the lack of sleep." Just replace pretending to study for the bar with any of those three and you have the reasons right there.

Without further ado, here's a little trip down Moustachio Drive:

This is all that we had pictures of. Turns out that you don't end up taking too many pictures when at least one of your hands tends to have a bottle of Bird 101 in it. I was thinking about making some sort of mix and match game, where you pick out which one of the group looks the most like a rapist, but after looking at this group it's just not possible. The answer would end up being A-F.

Only one is fake, all are horrible. None of us are cops, although it is telling that only two of us have jobs. Also, I'm pretty sure moustache number 5 belongs to a child molester.