Education in Review: Harvard University

I was watching some mindless television at two o'clock in the morning the other night and came across some programming that epitomized exactly how much I was wasting my time. Granted, I'm all about laying in bed at night, willing to be quasi-entertained by whatever happens to be on, fingers crossed, hoping to watch that sweet total gym commercial with Christie Brinkley and Chuck Norris. It's basically an attempt to stave off the darkness that creeps in on the outside of my vision, the sort that usually only an unhealthy dose of ketamine brings.

So anyway, back to the initial point. I flipped through the channels and CNN caught my eye. It was Larry King Live with Chris Rock as his guest. I think he was pitching that shitty looking "I Think I Love My Wife" movie. Of course he doesn't love his wife. He tolerates the mother of his children. At best. What surprised me was the language that he was getting away with. He caught himself saying tit and asked if he could get away with it. Larry King said he could, and then he himself said tit. Rock then said tit a bunch more times and King, unprovoked, called something or other a bunch of bitches. Rock then qualified that by saying that they were bitches that needed to be slapped. Which is the best way to describe Harvard.

A bunch of bitches that need to be slapped. Here's a quick anecdote that best describes what a bunch of bitches Harvard is. Direct from Wikipedia: "Maroon was not [Fordham's] original color, magenta was. Magenta was used on the uniforms of Fordham's "base-ball nines." The color was also used by Fordham's archrival, Harvard. Both institutions claimed prior right to use of magenta, and neither institution was willing to make concessions. Since it was "improper" for two schools to be wearing the same colors, the matter was to be settled by a series of baseball games. The winning team could lay claim to magenta. The losing team would have to find another color. Fordham won, but Harvard reneged on its promise."

I hope they all get great jobs, the kind of great jobs that I could never get. I hope they are extremely successful in those jobs and really make an impact on society. I hope it's the kind of impact that really makes the world better for all of us. Then I hope they die of stress related diseases from the 80 hour weeks they worked for twenty-odd years. Also, if it's too much to ask, I wouldn't mind it if they were to die of an Oregon Trail type disease, like a snake bite or, even better, dysentery.

Verdict: One fist up, all the way up to the elbow.