Fact: There is nothing "realer" than Professional Wrestling

Hey Mike Vick. Write this down. There is life during an NFL suspension, and it doesn't involve dogfighting. It doesn't even involve real physical activity. All that's required is a name and a reputation for kind of being a badass, or being friends with people that do retarded things. TNA (Total Nonstop Action) wrestling capitalized on Adam "Pacman" Jones' suspension from football by pitting him in a tag team match against Kurt Angle and Sting. Pacman did not have to enter the ring until the last second to "cover" Sting and win the match. Apparently Pacman has to adhere to the terms of his contract which require that he refrain from any dangerous activity. (Hopefully someone learned from Big Ben and Kellen Winslow's motorcycle perils).

So apparently Team Pacman is now the TNA Wrestling champions. Congratulations. But I've got a great idea that will really launch TNA into prominance in the fake professional wrestling world. Team Pacman v. Team Ron Mexico. That's right, alter ego's collide in a winner take all cage match. But here's the kicker. Team Ron Mexico is forced to wear hoods to cover their herpes ridden faces, did I say hood? I meant ghost costumes. Why? Because what scares Pacman more than Ron Mexico? Ghosts. (and Mrs. Pacman).

Throw some fruit in there for bonus points, perhaps make it a maze cage match and BAM, instant classic. And when it's all over, no need for bells, just burn some lower case t's, for "time to leave." Winner takes Mrs. Pacman home.